When a Pancake Flipped My World
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Navigating Perimenopause Emotions
The small things that suddenly feel so big
I started noticing some perimenopausal symptoms shortly after I turned 40. Of course, back then, I had no idea what was happening to me. I just thought it was part of “getting older.” Little did I know that I was navigating perimenopause emotions. After doing some research into the changes women go through with age and having a good chat with my doctor about options to deal with the symptoms, I thought I had it under control. I honestly believed I had this stage of life all figured out.
Until one day, I did not.
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I have always been the kind of person who did not stress much about problems. I never sat for hours weighing pros and cons or second-guessing decisions. I just got on with things and dealt with challenges as they came. That was me, or at least, the me I knew. So imagine my fright the first time I burst into tears because I could not flip a pancake (it feels funny now, but believe me, I was not laughing at the time).
Then came the day I dropped my phone in the river (may it rest in peace there forever) and, not long after, our dog had a full-blown tantrum when we left him at home. In just a couple of hours, he managed to chew through shoes, bags, and leads. Deep down, I understood these things are just material and can be replaced. But at that moment, these perimenopause emotions felt very real, and I took it so personally. Instead of shrugging it off, I spiraled. I felt low for days, almost depressed, and all I wanted was to stay in bed and avoid everyone.
But why was I feeling this way? This was not me. At least, not the old version of me that I recognised.
That is when I began to understand that perimenopause is not just about hot flashes or irregular cycles. It is also about how our emotions shift—sometimes dramatically. Hormonal changes affect not just our bodies but also the way we perceive situations and respond to stress. Things that once seemed minor can suddenly feel overwhelming. And when you have spent your whole life knowing yourself as “resilient” or “calm,” these new emotional reactions can feel foreign, even frightening.
I know, you might be reading this and thinking, “Jeez, this woman needs to get real. There are so many people with real problems.” And of course, I know that. A lost phone, a ruined pair of shoes, or a pancake gone wrong are not the end of the world. These are small things, and in calmer times, I would have brushed them off without a second thought.
But that is the point. This is what I want to highlight—how irrational, emotional, or out of proportion some situations can feel during perimenopause. Hormonal shifts can completely change the way we react, making even everyday problems feel overwhelming. It is not a weakness, and it is not that we do not have perspective. It is that our bodies are changing in ways we cannot always predict or control.
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What I have learned (and am still learning) is that these changes do not mean I am weak or broken. They mean my body and mind are moving through a new stage, one that deserves patience, care, and compassion. I have had to reframe what “being in control” looks like. It means giving myself grace when I am emotional, asking for support when I need it, or simply accepting that it is okay to feel deeply. Sometimes life just forces us to slow down in unexpected ways, like losing a phone to a river and being without it for a few days. And in that forced pause, you realise how much you can actually enjoy life when you are not constantly connected.
Perimenopause has taught me that strength is not always about “just getting on with it.” Sometimes it is about slowing down, tuning in, and allowing yourself to feel, even if it is over a pancake.
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Join the conversation
I would love to hear from you. Have you noticed similar emotional ups and downs during perimenopause? How do you navigate perimenopause emotions or cope when small things suddenly feel overwhelming? Whether it is a story, a tip, or just a moment of understanding, sharing your experiences can help other women feel less alone. Drop a comment below or reach out, I would love for us to create a supportive space where we can talk openly, laugh (sometimes cry) together, and learn from each other.
Helpful Resources
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If you are navigating perimenopause emotions and want expert insights on how hormonal changes affect your mental health, I highly recommend listening to “Mental Health Check-In: Navigating Menopause and Finding Your Calm in the Chaos” with Dr Ariel Dalfen and Dr Bev Young. In this episode, the doctors explore how mood swings, anxiety, and emotional ups and downs are influenced by menopause, and they share practical strategies to help you cope and regain balance. It is an enlightening and supportive listen for anyone looking to understand their changing mind and body during this phase of life and beyond. You can listen to the full episode here: 49. Mental Health Check-In: Navigating Menopause and Finding Your Calm in the Chaos with Dr. Ariel Dalfen and Dr. Bev Young | Podcasts
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Perimenopause Power by Maisie Hill
Perimenopause Power is a comprehensive guide that empowers women to navigate the often-overlooked phase of perimenopause with confidence and clarity. Drawing from her expertise as a women’s health practitioner, Hill provides a blend of scientific insights and practical advice to help readers understand the physiological changes occurring during this transition. The book covers a range of topics, including hormonal fluctuations, symptom management, and lifestyle adjustments, offering tools to not just survive but thrive during perimenopause. Hill’s approachable writing style and evidence-based approach make this an essential resource for anyone seeking to understand and embrace this natural life stage.
Check out my post on The Power of Putting Your Well-Being First: https://vitalityher.com/mental-health-mindfulness-pause-play-replenish-the-power-of-putting-yourself-first-well-being/
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